Should I have another baby? When I hear other women ask this question, I am always puzzled by the idea that some people PLAN these things. I have been fortunate that my husband and I have never had to “try” to get pregnant. Yes they were very blessed. If you ever saw me in the middle of my first few quarters, you might have seen me shaking my fists at the sky and yelling, “Stop blessing me!”
When you have a child every two years (more or less) like me, your children start to wait for a new addition. They say things like, “I ate a baby brudder” and “Mom, can we name our new baby Frederica?” and “Mom, can we have a girl later?” Those are the easy questions; I still don’t know exactly what to say when young children ask “How do you get your baby out?” or even worse, “How did your baby get? on? “.
Number 6 (so five years): Can I watch Netflix?
Me (looking at photos on my phone): No, lunch is almost ready.
No. 6 (looking over my shoulder): Was that when Number 7 was on your belly?
Me: No, that’s when YOU were in my belly.
No. 6: And it was in my belly?
Me: Haha, no! Babies are only in mommy’s womb.
No. 6: Well, how do they come out? … Mom, how did it come out of your belly?
I: * Totally trying to change the subject *
No. 6: Mom, did they cut you off? How did they get it out?
I: * sigh * Moms have special holes that babies can come out of.
No. 6 (grinning widely): Is it your belly button?
Me: … What do you want to see on Netflix?
Should I have another baby?
In every family, motherhood has its pros and cons, no matter how big or small your family is. I have always believed that the only consideration should be love: are you willing to selflessly love a new addition? If so, then everything else can be solved.
I know what it feels like to cringe at the prospect of telling family and friends you’re pregnant. again. There seems to be something shameful about having more than three children; almost as if I was now personally responsible for overpopulation and for rolling feminism back 50 years. Avoiding sarcastic jokes, pity, and even hostility from others is inevitable. Resources (financial, time, emotional, etc.) should always be addressed. Having another baby is not easy.
Still, we love having a large family, but I hate, hate, hate, first trimester disease. If I could have a new baby without morning sickness, I would be perfectly happy. Some people collect weird things, don’t judge me.
No. 6 (8 years): What if we have another baby? We would have to go through all the trouble of naming it.
Me: What would you call it?
No. 6 * falls off the chair *: Oww!
Me: No, that’s not a good name.
No. 6: Owwlexander.
Dad: Good recovery.
Benefits of having multiple children
My two girls are the best of friends. They share everything except clothes. The sound of them laughing with their heads together fills my heart with joy. The four boys after the girls are also best friends. They use their imaginations together, they play together and they entertain themselves endlessly. Best of all, there are things that everyone enjoys together; there are programs that none of them will see if one of them is missing. (By disappearing, I mean leaving the house for some reason … not actually next to a carton of milk.)
There really are so many benefits to having multiple children … ‘Of course, you usually don’t see them between 8:00 p.m. M. And 6:00 a. M. Although, come to think of it, the morning after thunderstorms or bad dreams, the kids are in a brother’s or sister’s bed instead of mine!
Are you having another baby?
Children are always on the lookout for new baby signs, “Mom, your butt is so big! Are you having another baby?!?” Of course, children are not the only ones asking this question. Many people ask, with a kind of morbid fascination, if my husband and I are “done” yet. It doesn’t offend me; I also ask myself that question.
Children are not the only ones who assume that there will be another addition in the future. My last invitation for Baby Shower read “You are invited to The Taco Mom’s biannual Baby Shower! “
“It’s time for another baby!”
People tend to assume that I planned to have all these children, but “planned” is a strong word. I once asked my husband, “Should I have another baby?” But it turned out that she was already pregnant. My sisters like to tease me and tell me when it’s time for me to have another baby. My answer: “You first!”
So … should you have another baby?
In the end, you are the only person who can answer this question for yourself. There are enormous amounts of joy and love involved in having multiple children, but it also involves an enormous amount of work. If this post seems a bit biased towards having more children, it may be to make me feel better about having seven children. But seriously, this life is not for everyone. All we can do is search our hearts, pray, and accept God’s will for us … you know, after a brief period of raging to the skies.